Comic by Cassandra CalinIt happens.

You’re 18-30 months into transition. You’re full time, you’ve done the majority of your coming out, your legal changes are done, maybe a surgery behind you, and the body shifts have slowed to subtlety. You might still have some surgeries ahead of you, but the bulk of the “work” of transition is finished. You start to feel disconnected from the person you used to be. Now what?

Now. What.

Now you live.

It reminds me so much of graduating from high school. Your entire life has been leading you to this day, every moment wrapped up in getting through graduation, and now… where do you go? Well… if you’re a millennial you probably didn’t go anywhere for another 5-10 years, but I digress.

Maybe you realize that the things you enjoyed before just don’t interest you as much. Old hobbies are less obsessive, being replaced by new interests and activities. Maybe your life has become more social as you expand out into new friendships and/or couplings. Transition gradually falls behind you, it just becomes part of your life, less important the further you get from it. But what do you do with yourself once you’ve reached this place?

Some people go back to college, having found themselves able to focus again now that their brains aren’t suppressed by dysphoria. Some people start a new career, having found that what they did pre-transition just doesn’t ring true to them any more, or because they were forced out of their previous career when they pursued transition. Some people move, relocating to places more hospitable to people like us, liberal cities where we don’t have to be as afraid. Some people launch a social media presence where they blog about their life and obsessively post photos of their clothes and gab about their mental health problems. 🤷‍♀️

But I would imagine that most trans people don’t do anything. They just continue on with life, nothing drastic, nothing extraordinary, just normalcy. Depending on how those around them reacted to transition, there may have been very little change in their lives at all.

Imagine what that must be like, for transition to have been completely mundane. How… drab.