I have been in this mental space so many times, and it messes with you so much. I never get any male attention when I’m out and about in the world, I am invisible to them. Women notice me, because of how I dress, but that alone doesn’t draw the male gaze, and I’ve considered the causes of that many times. I don’t WANT that attention, I’m actually very thankful that I don’t have to deal with that every day, but still I feel its void.
And that is so fucked up! That harassment from men should be such a normal part of womanhood that I note it’s absence and see it as a judgment of myself is just wrong on so many levels! My worth has absolutely NOTHING to so with how desirable I am to men, but I’ve absorbed this patriarchal behavior so well that I cannot help but feel low for it.
Fuck men, fuck the patriarchy, and fuck measuring my womanhood with the objectification of assholes.