This thread by LightningBug really spoke to me. I’ve written in the past about the conflicts that one can meet trying to reconcile fatness with gender dysphoria.

Yes, there are a LOT of societal influences that affect our perceptions of our bodies, both for men and women, and trans people do internalize the messaging for our true gender long before we may even know what that gender is, but there is so much more deeply physiological beneath that psychology. What outwardly may seem like body issues from cultural indoctrination may be much deeper than that.

Hating your fat body may not always a case of learning to love yourself, and it’s important to self analyze when examining these feelings (Is this dysphoria, or is it just cultural?) and to give space to others with their own issues. If someone, especially a trans person, complains about their body or their fat, responding with comments that they’re just internalizing beauty standards can be extremely dismissive, and even by gaslighting of their struggles. Even statements like “Oh, your body looks just like mine, you’re fine” can be detrimental (and I’ve even been guilty of this myself). Gender Dysphoria doesn’t care if the shape is within cis norms of our true gender, it cares about if it falls in cis norms of our assigned gender.

It’s also important to acknowledge that things you might be self-conscious about may actually be very affirming for others. LB mentions how underarm fat and back rolls can be euphoric, even tho many cis women are self conscious about them. Personally, I am extremely aware of how large my upper arms have become in the last year, and sometimes it bothers me in certain outfits, but it’s also EXTREMELY affirming to have it. It’s quintessentially female fat, and it makes me feel so good. Photos from behind of me in my yellow swimsuit make me feel AMAZING entirely because of the back fat I have developed.

It’s a difficult balance to reach, managing these dual body images, but there is a lot of peace to be found as a trans fat once you figure it all out.

Discuss this post on Instagram